What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

What's worse than stabbing your eye with a fork? Stabbing both your eyes with a fork.

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

FUS RO DAH!!!

Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

What do cows in Africa say? Moo

Why did the man dig his nose? because everyone digs their nose

whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

One game a Packers Player scored a touchdown and jumped into the stands. When everybody was touching him one girl put her hand on the inside of his thigh. He told the girl " If your hand goes a little higher you'll feel my touchdown spike."

What's funnier than a dead baby? Almost everything. Infant mortality rates are incrediby high in many third world countries, and it is certainly no laughing matter.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A drum set.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

Why did the boy loose his hat Because he got hit by a plane

What is the difference between a rabbit and a plum? A: They are both purple, except for the rabbit!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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