A blonde boards a plane and sits in first class. Another passenger sees the blonde in his seat and tells her she's in the wrong seat. "I'm not moving!" says the blonde. The passenger calls over the flight attendant. "Ma'am, you're supposed to be seated in economy class," says the flight attendant. "Please come with me." "No! I'm not moving!" The flight attendant informs the pilot. The pilot comes out, whispers in the blonde's ear, and then the two have wild sex, right in the open. Oh my God, you should have been there. She had the most incredible rack ever!!!

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The boy wakes up and says "I'm feeling kind of fishy today." The dad come into the sea anemone and says that's because you are, Nemo.

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her.

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roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Anywhere from 2-8, depending on the size of the vehicle.

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what kind of sex did ethan have? webcam sex

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What made your girlfriend laugh to death? You dropped my pants.

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Gustavo Andrade

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Why can't Michael Jackson swim? Because he is dead.

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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What happend to the Jew when he was near the fire place He very carefully tended to it

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What did the Iraqi Suicide bomber bring on the airplane? His Kindle, he enjoys reading books

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What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

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My aunt said slow and steady wins the race....... She died in a fire

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how do you keep a bunch of black kids from jumping on the bed? your real firm with them and tell them someone may hurt themselves if they don't stop with the horseplay..

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Whats worst than a cold? Being shot in the face repeatadly by a rocket launcher until death.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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Q. What do you call a child with no friends or family A. Adopted

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? -Who's there? Not the girl.

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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