how makes licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? depends on how determined you are to find out

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What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

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A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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I just flew here from Cleveland, and boy are my arms tired! The people on either side of me were hogging the armrests, so I had to kind of tuck my arms up behind my head and it was very uncomfortable.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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The latter three thousand pages of this website.

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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Do you know what the meaning of life is? Of course you don't.

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What did little Susie give to young Billy on Christmas? Genital Herpes.

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(A man in a dark van pulls up)... Hey kids can you come help me find my puppy? The kids get in the car and they find the puppy in a near by park. The kids are then safely returned home.

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Andrew's a bald wankstain.

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How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

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Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a free-range chicken

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A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper.'" Then the mother, realizing how her son could later become confused, clarified. She said, "You can say you have to pee as long as you say it in a quiet voice." The boy understood. There were no problems afterwards.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

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Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

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What Batman said to Robin before they got in the car? -Get in the car Robin!

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What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

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What's a Gingers favorite drink? Coke!

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why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops