What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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What did casino dealer say to the other? Every day I'm shuffling.

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a irish man walks past a bar

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What would George washington do if he was still alive He isn't so we dont have to worry about that.

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i hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy lllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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Hitler, Goebbels and Göring walked into a bar. They ordered 3 steins and took their seats in quiet corner of the establishment. After short deliberation they were ready to start work on building a highway that would be the envy of the world.

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

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What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

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Yo mama's so white, she's an albino!

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Why was the black boy late for school? He missed the bus

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A rabi a priest and a gay guy are praying. The rabi says amen the priest says amen the gay guy says ahh men.

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Q.what did god say when he made the first black person? A.oh shit i burnt it.

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Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she fell out the window and landed in soot.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

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potatoes

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If 1+1=2 why does 2+2 not equal 3?

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Why did the jew give all his money away to charity? -No I'm kidding, he didn't.

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What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

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If a tree falls in the forest, does anyone hear it? no, but it was home to several endangered species that are now extinct

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Why wasn't the crow allowed on the plane? He had too much carrion luggage

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I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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