Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

hi hi stop! no yes no no stop no grr lol i will get you back not if i fool grrrrrrr BOOM BOOMBOTH:GRRR BOOM BOOM lol lol both:grrrr THE END BY STICK SMOKER

Jeremy has 8 apples. Susie has 3. how much does Jason have? Purple because aliens don't like grapes.

Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

The ability to live the life of a dead person.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

So a man is in a car smoking weed when he forgets to crack a window so he over doses and dies. The car crashes and he kills 3 other people.

What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

What did the homeless man say to his family? Nothing. His family left him after he lost his job.

what do you call a top thats spining? A spinning top

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

Joke: two polar bears were in a bath tub. One said "pass the soap." And the other one said "no soap, radio!"

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

hello anomonous

Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

We are as to jokes as atheists are to religion.

Friend: What do you call a farting dog? Me: A canine releasing built up pressure as a result of excess carbon-based gases produced by the synthesizing and decompositional digestive reactions in the stomach and intestines. Friend: ... Who is a nerd, pointless, has no social life, and cant take a joke? Me: No one. No one but you is that exceptionally lacking in character.

Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colorblind

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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