Why did the boy fall asleep in class? He was tired.

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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Your Mommy is a gas pump.

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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Want to here a joke? The First Amendment.

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Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

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Saggy Nipples By chan chan

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how many jews can you fit in a volkswagon? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 6 million in the ash trey.

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69

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Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

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Nah, could not care less about how I sound on "The network", its just that I spent all night finishing the core concept to my new novel, and all the capital letters and stuff sound like Jim Carrey in my head as I type. So Redcunt, where you going? When you coming back?

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Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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what do u do if a women serves you lunch in the living room? u tighten the chain!!!!!!

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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Ryan Holden is a faggot.

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What do you do when a taco eater gives you guacamole? Thank him, and politely smash it in the face of the nearest trashy tourist.

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Simon says.. Nothing because he is deaf, so therefor he would have to sign it to you.

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kronkel spasm dizzle nork is short for: i cant believe you bought a ninja monkey to scratch your clownitis! i am randomly going to have a spasm cause i am down with that dizzle..... lets watch a show callled norks! i am pregnant with your baby ducky.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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What's the difference between michael jackson and casey anthony? Michael jackson's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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