I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Women's rights.

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Why didn't the cat have any legs? Because it was a snake

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

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What did everyone call the ginger kid? Jimmy as that was his name...

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

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Why was the black man in the hotel so upset? I shit on his chest.

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tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

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What is funnier than 24? The fact that you think numbers are funny?

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Q:How meny jews can u fit in a mini? A:5 in the seats and 1 million in the ashtray.

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whats black and white? Micheal Jackson. - Avery Vartanian

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Whats worse than peeing blood? Dying.

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How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

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Q:A man walked into a bar. He looked at everyone and suddenly started crying. Why? A: Because everyone was drunk, and therefore came to the point where no one could remember him or anyone else.

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What did Hitler say to Obama Nothing because Hitler is dead.

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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what is white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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You come across a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. Why are you telling a joke? Go make sex.

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How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

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a red boat and a blue boat collided all the survivors still have nightmares to this day

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Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

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Well... At that time everyone expected that the only people that knew hypnosis where either "born with the gift from the stars" or was some old beard man that spent "hundreds of years in the mountains".or a wizard or a shamanic priest, or well some guy in a particular stupid suit of sorts, it increased its potency simple as that, as having people stare at me and laugh because "You are not some beardy guru master" is a pretty bad start for the effective use of mass hypnosis. Mono-ideoism actually just means really concentrated focus on a single object or state of mind, the thing about the name (aside from sounding kinda mono-idiotic) is that strong focus alone does NOT lead to a state of relaxation which is one of the prime requirements to achieve a state of trance, I mean try focusing on something really hard and your body produces a huge amount of beta waves, aka stress. All of that is bullshit, but my horrible childhood did leave me with the "gift" to space out pretty quickly, so I learned it pretty fast without really knowing what it was at first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops