Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

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roses are red violets are blue i like elephants

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

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hi joshua

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whats green and has wheels grass and i lied about the wheels

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Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

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My friend Keith found a worm in his apple. He ate it anyways

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't know any better. It very recently was decapitated in order tofeed the farmers family.

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How many Legos can you stick up your nose? I'm sure its very painful and considered stupid so don't try it.

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What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

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You are in an airplane, and you have 500 bricks. You throw one out the door. How many do you have? 499. What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a fridge? 1-open the door,2-put the elephant in,3-close the door. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and shut the door. The lion king is having a party for all the animals… which one didn't go? The giraffe, it's in the fridge. An old lady is trying to cross an alligator infested river. She makes it over. How? The alligators are at the party. She dies anyway. How? She gets hit by the brick you threw out of the window.

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Q: What did Michael Jackson do while he was preparing for his newest world tour? A: He died.

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Miss Hoolie: Hello, PC Plum. What's the story in Balamory? PC Plum: I'm arresting you for the sexual molestation of twenty children.

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Black people

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Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

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Whats a welfare? Its what keeps you alive.

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Yesterday I was walking my dog and while I was walking my dog, guess what happened? It got hit by a bus.

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Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

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Going out for a quiet one, having a drink or two, and returning home.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

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People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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