how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

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There are two muffins in the oven. One muffin says to the other "phew it's kinda hot in here" the other muffin says "AWW a talking muffin!"

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So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

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your moms fat. she's ugly too.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

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Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

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Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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a blind man walks into a bar it hurt.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

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hi.... bonjour... hola... DOOO YOUUUU UNDERSTANDDD MEEE !!!!!!!!!!!

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

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Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

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Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

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i was molested.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

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whats forever alone me

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A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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