What's red, blue, green, yellow, pink, purple, orange, teal, light green, brown, black and white? Colours, except for black and white, for they are the absence and amalgam of all colours, respectively.

A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

i did not type this on 12/23/11 at 8:49:47

why did the bear eat meat? he was hungry

Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

It's black, and when it falls out of a tree, your refrigurator is broken. Your refrigurator.

Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

Your mom is so...wonderful.

What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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