two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

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You spent your time reading this and realized there was no joke.

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david weres the slug gone

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven kind of looked like an alligator.

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Yo mama is so nasty she won't take a shower till she is dead you idiot says the boy she won't die she has twenty thousand live

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What is large, heavy, tastes like poptarts, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A semi truck full of poptarts

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Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

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a man shoots his mother in-law He his charged with murder and will only be eligible for parole in 18 months

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roses are red so are the jews every one loved that holocaust news

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Roses are red. Violets are purple

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A black man with a blond beard came to deliver me a pizza. I paid him, tipped him, and closed my door. I forgot the pizza. Dammit.

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Whats the difference between a Preius and a vagina? One's the possibly the greatest invention of all time and possibly the only hope for the future of man kind. The others a Preius.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penuin that got bit by a sea lion.

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Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

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What do you call a penguin that hangs around in playgrounds? A paedophile.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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what's the difference between you and a yack one is a spitting idiot and the other one is a camel

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what do u get when two cars collide... a bunch of mexican

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there was a turkey sandwhich..... a ham sandwhich.... and a bologna sandwhich..... they had a short conversation before they were eatin by a fat kid

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

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Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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