What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

Why did the scientist go to the hospital? because he was experimenting with dangerous chemicals, and they exploded in his unsuspecting face. He doesn't have skin now.

GONNA

the story of the two kings, bourne and brendan They were numbercrunching hardcore one night in the hills of arathi basin when the mailbrethren gave them a message from the almighty rogue of orgimar. This rogue challenged the two kings, codenames as follows: bourne (hunt cair) and brendan (worgensRsick). obviously bourne was a ret pally and brendan was a holy priest, representing the alliance faction because they dont belive in the corrupt (actual quote from J3b, "the kitty slayer tauren"). The duel would take place in the arena of hyjal, a place where heat blows from below, and sucks hard. Hyjal was once a place where the almighty druids had meetings of total epicness and made love in the flowers. Of course, taurens were very attracted to the mentally ill cows, and created j3b's character, foulmeat. When the two kings arrived, the rogue was actually in stealth, a goblin subtley rogue of vast strength and agil. His resil rating was at an astonishing 89k rating. He made n00bs spooge over their keyboards. The epic duel began when the rogue sapped both kings and ambushed bourne. Bourne legacy was hurt badly and had 15% health. Brendan's step brother came in and surprised attacked the rogue and took him to half health. his name was dalyquestsbedone. But all of a sudden, the world of azeroth was sucked in by the depths of the maelastrom of deathwing, and everyone died. All the players relogged and did it all over again. ˜´??

Anything involving women..

A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

A man with a mustache enters your parents home to tell them you were kidnapped and taken to the pier 1 hour away. They leave and he goes upstairs to rape you for 1 hour. Never trust people with mustaches.

Doctor: I bring grave news. Your wife is dying. She won't survive for another 100 years. Concerned and anguished Husband: Oh... that's ok! Doctor: Oh did I say years? I meant days! Oh the mirth! *The doctor breaks down into hysterical laughter, which the Concerned and Anguished Husband is furious to see, as the Doctor is taking delight out of such a grave situation.

So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

what do you call a attractive blond haired girl who sings songs. pixie lott

Why did the guy die? He had a fatal heart attack.

1: Knock Knock. 2: Who's there? 1: To. 2: To Who? 1: To whom.

what is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? dead babies dont stick to the roof of your mouth when you are eating them.

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

How do you scare a brunette? Hide behind a door or wall until the unsuspecting person walks by, then jump out and yell.

Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

Q: What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? A: One dead baby in 6 trash cans.

A man is jogging down the street. He bangs his kneecap into a metal pole and shatters it. He is then hit by a giant cheese wheel and dies.

why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

What did the horse with herpes say to Paul? Ney

Do your parents know you're gay?

Two elephants in a bathtub, one says, "Pass the soap." The other one says, "No soap. Radio?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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