Facebook How i met my mother

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i like it in the mouth

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After visiting the dentist, Ke$ha had sixteen cavities because brushing your teeth with bottles of jack causes plaque to build up.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? None, for the task at hand is so simple, you should do it.

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"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

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What is lazy? My balls. All they do is hang.

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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Why scooby-doo likes cookies? Because he's chub!

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Bariande: I have a belly button Kraken: haha who doesnt? MissAwkward: i dont Barinade: neither do i. haha this happened on tiny chat.

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A black man walks into a bar and treated with equal care

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

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rocky is staring at us from outside...

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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Why did the man get a tattoo? A: he wanted to express himself.

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What did the policeman say to the black thief? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police and to have an attorney present during questioning now or in the future. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you before any questioning, if you wish. If you decide to answer any questions now, without an attorney present, you will still have the right to stop answering at any time until you talk to an attorney. Knowing and understanding your rights as I have explained them to you, are you willing to answer my questions without an attorney present.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

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Listen, I do not really care anymore, I admit it, I dont mind screwing with people, but if your name is Tifa, my name is lets see... Solid Snake, yeah, but call me big boss. Listen, be honest with me, if you do not trust me, just do not give me a random name, Tifa as in Tifa Lockheart? Final Fantasy? Wake up, girl/guy, you are losing your touch at this.

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What happened to the man who posted yet another repeated joke on anti joke? Nothing. He posted an old joke that everyone has seen a form of already.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Your definitely a virgin, too bad your mom isn't too.

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Why didn't the Hawaiian man know how to surf? He lives in Kansas

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he found a crosswalk with a walk symbol near his destination.

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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