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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the white man say to the black man that sneezed? -Bless you.

Why was the woman sad on her 21st birthday? Because she was born on September 11,1980

Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

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How do you tell if someone likes butter? You ask them

How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

Why was the man so hungry? Because he hadn't eaten in days.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was an avocado

What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

How are a black man, a hispanic man, and a chinese man similar? Believe it or not they all love cantaloupe!

What did the army guy say when he lost his gun. Wheres my gun.

what did the dead man say to the other dead man ...nothing he's dead.

ronald wants to join a gym, they tell him to lose 20 pounds before coming back or else.....

What did the cat say to the cat? Miau

What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? There's twenty of them

A man and his son cross the street, the man hears a screaming noise and ignores it, the man gets across and notice his wife missing...

Why did the woman cross the road? Trick question, she didn't because she was in the kitchen.

Why didn't suzie eat? Because she wasn't hungry

John has 58 candy bars. He eats 40, what does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? Well, the difference is quite obvious. one's a car, the other's a dead baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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