Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

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Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

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whats black and white? a zebra

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I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

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A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

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why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink and sighs heavily, waiting to escape the reality of his broken home, his cheating wife, and his high school dropout kid.

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks. Thumbs up if you get it.

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Ask me if I'm a dinosaur. Are you dinosaur? No.

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A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand. thats impossible, because nature says that ducks cannot walk.

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Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

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If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

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Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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