What happens when three blind mice go our looking for food? They die because of the mouse traps the owners have because they are tired of loosing food to the mice.

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A sober Irish individual.

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Eating food: Ugh disgusting! Taking a dump later: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Man, you are doing it wrong... Waterworld was a pretty dry movie, I mean when are they gonna start making movies with a bit of wet humor for a change? SERIOUSLY BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I AM NOT SERIOUS!

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While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

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Yo mama's so ugly, She cured cancer.

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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John has 58 candy bars. He eats 40, what does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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I'm funnY!!! Haha pënis

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A girl asks a guy are you finish. The guy says no I'm British.

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How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

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Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

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What's the difference between a red ball and a blue ball? There both blue but the red one

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Yeah, it makes sense if you think about it, I changed my alias back and forth from Axel Knight, to Axel White, first because Axel White sounded not only as a opposite to Nero, but also because it sounded like something a Nazi leader would call himself, we went renegade and used that in order to draw in and bust a lot of Neo Nazi`s with enough money and bad intentions to make bad stuff happen. But thats another story, I heard about an Axel Knight partaking in Point Zero, had I known you where the leader (I hope you are being honest friend) I would have warned you much sooner, but there was no way for me to know if you where working together... Since you literally where.

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Whats do Hispanics and Blacks have in common? They are both stereo-typically defined and thus the subject of many popular jokes.

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what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

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what's the difference between a pogo stick and a traffic cone? well for starters, traffic a cones main function is to cordon off areas or alert drivers to certain areas of road that are not to be breached and pogo sticks are used as toys to heighten bouncing. I'll stop here but the list goes on.

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what did the dead man say to the other dead man ...nothing he's dead.

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a 7 year old child is watching a show that involves a c0ck, an ass, a bitch, and a bastard......... However this show is completely appropriate for a 7 year old, what could possibly be inappropriate about a chicken, donkey, dog and an orphan?

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Phil sees a hitchhiker wandering past his car on the sidewalk. He asks Phil if he can take him to his house, and Phil says no, and keeps driving. Six seconds later the hitchhiker is crossing the street in search of somebody else, when he is hit by a bus and dies.

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What did the president do for the people? ...

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Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

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I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

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One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

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hey how do you turn the Xbox controller off thats easy turn the xbox off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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