What's more fun that being raped? Not being raped.

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roses are red so are the jews every one loved that holocaust news

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What do a vampire and a ginger have in common they're both afraid of the sunligh- oh wait this anti jokes ohhhhhhh oh well

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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What do you get when you cross a squirrel and lasagna? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

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So Helen Keller walked into a bar... and then a chair.... and then a table..

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What did the prostitute get for Christmas Money

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? A Ferrari was never alive.

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How many of my Dad's "fishing buddies" have gone down to the basement for a "meeting", but never returned? 37 so far. I'm concerned. I seriously have never seen my dad fish. Pretty sure he doesn't own a fishing pole.

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Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

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A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

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My girlfriend said she doesn't like anti jokes and now i'm single ha ha just kidding.... she's dead

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What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

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What did the kid with all F's on his report card get? Beat by his parents

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?... CAUSE HE FELT LIKE IT, IDIOT

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When is it okay for priests to touch underage boys? Ash Wednesday, they have place ash using their hands on the boys foreheads.

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HURT

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What shoes keep dogs quiet? Hush puppies.

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Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.

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What did the one alcoholic say to the other? We are both alcoholics

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whats worst then being raped tortured and killed? it happening to 500000 puppies DX

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What do you get if you cross an angle with an antelope? An anglelope.

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You know what they call men who make kitchen jokes? Single.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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