Keanu Reaves

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#IHateHashtags

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers, Delphiniums are also blue.

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Sometimes I fantasize about having sexual relations with Oprah Winfrey. Sometimes I don't.

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Yo mama has had so many kidney stones she has to be on a water diet.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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A piece of wood walks into a bonfire. Wood can't walk.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to have some hanky panky , but silly Jill forgot her pill so now there's little Frankie...

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There were two bagels sitting on a table in Denny's. One bagel turns to the other and says, "So how did that job interview go?" The other replies, "It went great, thanks".

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Why did Gary's cat fall from the tree? He didn't use enough gaffa tape.

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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steven hawking walks into a bar

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What did the kid with cancer get for christmas? Hope.

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Whats red and dirty? Her period

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So a person asked a blonde in America which was closer: the Moon or Canada? The blonde responded "Canada"

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An old lady says, "Oh i see now." The guy standing next to her says, " Honey oyu know im blind right?"

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When I was just a little kid, my daddy lest the house and we all joined him to wherever he wanted to live.

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How did the girl get her Mardi Gras beads? She purchased them at a reasonable price from a party store.

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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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so a blonde walks into a bank, opens her purse, pulls out her check and cashes it. She then returns to her car and proceeds home.

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a man makes a bad joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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