What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

why did the mom beat up her son with downs because he was matt daly

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What did Justin Bieber say when he lost his tampon? Where's my tampon?

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do you get on anti-jokes.com? A bunch of repeated "jokes", that don't make any sense.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Your mama's so skinny; she can fit into most swimsuits sizes 4-6 and has a rather petite bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

thumb_up thumb_down -38

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

thumb_up thumb_down -38

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

thumb_up thumb_down -38

how do you stop a bus? Well, just up the road is a stop sign so the bus will stop there because it is illegal to go through a stop sign without stopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

(Guys I want to get the most likes so like my joke.) What did the person want. To get the most likes :)

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why was the man sad? Cause his dog fell off a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Q: whats good about having sex with 18 year olds? A: there's 18 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff!

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why can't Stephen Hawking go to the moon? He can, it would require a great sum of money, and extensive anti-gravity training.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What do you get when you mix a baby and a fork? An abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why did the dog start barking? Because it was a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

thumb_up thumb_down -40

what is brown and wet? Muddy water

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A blind man watches TV

thumb_up thumb_down -40

The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops