Why did the doctor commit suicide? His wife was recently killed in a car accident and simply could not take the emotional pain!

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How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue we're going to have sex because i'm stronger than you

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Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

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Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

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I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

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Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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What did the taxi friver say to the man? "You forgot your briefcase"

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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What's the difference between Nelly and Common? One of them is an artist and one of them is a businessman.

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What you reading? reading?

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Wolf Wolf who? Wolf who!? Is that really the first question that comes to mind when confronted with a talking wolf?

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

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Why did the man pull out his chainsaw? To get rid of a tree in his front yard.

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Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

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https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM8MQg1bn9y38H8Irhuxx-g

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how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a question.

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Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? No. You don't need to, it's quite inappropriate.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? John.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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