What kind of words did the terrorist say on his date? His last ones.

Q:Why are babies and spaghetti alike? A:They both stick to the wall when cooked.

Q.What did the German say when he walked into the bar? A.Ich möchte ein Bier bitte. Das würde mich viel besser fühlen. Meine Frau ist gerade gestorben, weil ich sie zu Tode prügeln, und ich bin ein Alkoholiker.

Why was the kid crying Cuz there was a frog stapled to his head

What do 69 and 420 have in common? That was my score on my Math final:(

How are Lamborghinis and piles of dead babies alike? I don't have either in my garage. Except for the pile of dead babies.

Why did the Chicken Cross the road? Because it did...

Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

what is meaningless and not fun at all? that joke

What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

A guy walks into a bar and says 'Ow!'

Why did the blonde commit suicide? Because she hated her life.

Whats the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari? The Ferrari isn't in my garage.

What's red, black, and green all over? A dead black bear. Just no green.

Why don't you see elephants find in trees? Because most trees can't hold an elephants weight.

An Amish man walks into a bar. He then orders a non-alcoholic beverage due to the temperance practices of the Amish faith.

There is a blonde a Burnett and a red head. Life goes on.

Q: What did the train say when it sneezed twice? A: Trains are inanimate objects, thus they cannot sneeze or talk. Are you an idiot?

White men's rights

Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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