why did the duck fall in the water? It got shot

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

Gay's

What's black, white, and red all over? A pile of dead nuns.

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

Who won the race across the highway, the Mexican or the Frenchman? Neither, as they were struck by a mac truck when attempting to run across the highway and were both killed instantly on impact.

Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gun store to buy a gun. After years of abuse and mockery, he was tired of being called "chicken", and was going to shoot up the entire school

What's the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? There's been sittings of bigfoot

What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

Why was the young women crying Because her fiancé who was battling a severe Case of pneumonia just passed away

What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

What do you say to two cows? Hey cows.

What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

What's the best part of any family reunion? Sodomy.

What's funnier than a dead baby? Almost everything. Infant mortality rates are incrediby high in many third world countries, and it is certainly no laughing matter.

roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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