Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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Who does creatine? James Cornish

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What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

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Why do women live longer? Because they work weaker.

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What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

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What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

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Knock Knock! Who's there? ... THE DOOR!!

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dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

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knock knock?? whos there?? Not yo cheese because i already ate it

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

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What do you call a black guy who walks into your house and takes your stuff. A repoman, pay your taxes next time

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Why did Oliver fall? He shot himself.

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Q: What comes first the chicken or the egg? A: Pineapple.

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where did little suzie go during 9/11 EVERYWHERE...

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Black people.

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Yo momma's so fat, she's most likely to be at risk of high cholesterol and should probably get herself tested at her nearest health clinic.

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Person 1: Happy Halloween! Person 2: Hey, I'm Jewish

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Adam and Eve ate the apple and felt a bit ashamed and stuff. God looked upon them and said, well its just a fucking apple get outta here you kids! Adam and Eve also took things a bit too literal

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A girl that had Malaria couldn't play with her friends, whys this? She died.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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