A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

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What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

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What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

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what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

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Why can't Helen Keller conduct a Train. Because she is dead.

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What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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minorities

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Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

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Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

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Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

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Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

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why was the woman afraid of her bestfriend he raped her

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Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

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What is the only day of the year when you're guaranteed to find me? The day I kill you.

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What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

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don't make holocaust jokes, my grandfather died in the holocaust, he fell out of the birds nest shooting Jews.

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A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

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What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled ice cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo, time to go to Auschwitz.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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