Knock Knock Who's there? no one, you've got Psycosis

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What do Mitt Romney and Barak Obama have in common? Nothing that is why they are running against each other for US President.

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What do cookies and Ruber have in common? Ones edible one is not

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roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

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Yo mamma so crazy She chloroformed a 4 year old and put her in her trunk and no one has ever heard of her since.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? I threw a ball at her.

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A lysdexic man tries to spell rentally metarded.

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why did the kid get home from school early cause he was home from school..

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that if she sat on me, she would crush my skull and kill me.

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im @ work, LOL.

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What did Thisara say? You cant see me bich

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If Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee got in a fight, who would win? Chuck Norris, since Bruce Lee is dead.

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An Asian, a white man and a black man were running in a race. The Asian won and the black man came second due to his lack of training and motivation over the past couple of months.

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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Need For Speed 30025 DRIVE OVER 60000 EXTREME CARS OVER 60 BILLION REAL LIFE GRAPHICS TRACKS! WHILE LISTENING TO BULLSHIT SONGS THAT MAKE YOU CRY! NO PAUSE BUTTON! EVERY CAR MUST BE UNLOCKED BY PLAYING THE SAME TRACK (Yeah music track too) OVER AND OVER AGAIN! OVER 6000000 ONLINE GAMERS AT THE SAME TIME WORLDWIDE, EACH TRACK HAS 5000000 THOUSAND LAPS SO THE FUN NEVER ENDS! UNLOCK ALL STUFF DLC: 6000 Bucks. Moral: So I have not been here since I called myself the sociopath or something, who the fuck are these Nero`s and Neronism and all that fuck? :( They almost improved my reputation! THATS HORRIBLE!

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Q: What's the difference between a grasshopper and pencil? A: Lots

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Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

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Why did the Muslim suicide bomber commit suicide? He was nervous and didn't think he could hijack a plane.

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why did the asian wearing a sombrero buy orange juice at 2am? because hes trying to stay sober and do away with alcohol for good because its ruining his family and he wants to be a good father and husband.

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i said call 911 and they said whats the number?

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Why is Kony so mean? He used to date your mom.

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virginity but he got it back

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Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

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I used to be an adventurer like you. But then I retired and started a family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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