Knock, Knock. Come in!

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Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

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If you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

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.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

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Why do black men like bit butts? Because they can not lie.

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Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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Your momma is so fat that when she fell over, she couldn't get back up without help, and she probably got several bruises.

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What do you call a tree with no branches? A stick.

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Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

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how do you get a happy man to stop smiling? hit him in the face repeatedly untill he is dead.

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Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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whats green and has wheels? a green tractor.

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Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Neither has he...

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

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Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

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Mack: Hello Jonathan: Hi Mack: My name is Mack, what's your name? Jonathan: My name is Billy Mack: You liar! I'm reading this post at anti-joke.com and whenever you reply, your name shows Johnathan! Johnathan: Well Mack, I guess you broke the 4th wall. By the way, this joke is over in 3, 2, 1...

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Funny names Alec Balls Isaac Balls Dick Hedd Willy lickerr Lydia Stick Gaylord Sugar Fanny Gouger

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Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

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My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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