What did the old lady call the black pilot who's name was Marcus? Marcus

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What did the Rose Bowl say to the Fiesta Bowl? We crushed the Orange Bowl.

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How do you kill a blonde? You wait until she dies of old age, then copyright her death.

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Knock knok ! Whos there? Buhu ! Buhu Who? Why are you crying?

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Q:What did grandma get for christmas? A:a coffen

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A few lice were drinking wine on a scalp. It is quite strange that a person had wine on their scalp.

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What's the difference between an onion and a baby ? You cry when you cut the onion.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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Q. Why didn't bob go to work today? A. I killed his family.

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting anal raped twice

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what did the man say when he walked into the bar? Ouch!

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven beat and raped Six when he was child multiple times, and Seven threatened to kill Six if he told anyone.

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Why couldn't the Indian kid read? He got shot in the eye.

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Why did the blonde ask the doctor if she should get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anal surgery is the only solution.

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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Q: Why can't a tomato fly a plane? A: Cuz it's a tomato

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look at the top of your screen. now look down. I MADE YOU DO THAT

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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What is an emulation? I am not as stupid as I seem by the way, I am just a bit shaky myself, but don't you worry i will answer whatever you need,

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what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A black man shoots someone. He was a cop and he killed a dangerous man who attacked him.

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One afternoon, a man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my youngest son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my second son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my oldest son is gay." the man replies. "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?." the bartender asks. The man thinks about it. "Yeah, my wife."

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A black man with a blond beard came to deliver me a pizza. I paid him, tipped him, and closed my door. I forgot the pizza. Dammit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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