Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

Why didn't the chicken cross tithe road Because it was a motorway

Why was the baby crying? Because she had a frog nailed to her face.

what do you do when your girlfriend gives you head while playing MW3? continue to play while politely asking her sister to make you a sandwhich

why did the duck cross the road? because his d**k was stuck in the chickens a**....

get in the car.

What should you do if you are being chased by a black man. keep running and if he tag's you, then you should try tag him back since this is a simple game of tag.

Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

Why did the plane crash. its pilot was a loaf of bread.

How do you feed 1000 people? Cook 1000 meals .

Why didn't Wendy want to sit down? Because her dad put a hand full of needles in her anus. - D

Moralman... Seriously man, take it easy, my name is Nero, yes I play dual identities sometimes, it is only in order to convey my hidden messages to my people. I am deeply sorry to admit that those that assaulted you where indeed from my order, they have been prosecuted by the law and excluded from our order.

I have a dig bick you that read wrong you read that wrong too.

Someone stopped playing Skyrim.

What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

True or False : it would not cause a public disturbence to express your P0rnagraphy to the public??? true. P0rnagraphy is the freedom of speech and ability to express oneself

My mum is called Steve

What did the Holocaust survivor say when asked about their memories in the deathcamps? A: I'd rather not think about it.

what did the orange say to the other orange? we are both oranges.

Hey do you know who is in the yard? Not the boys, they all died in a horrific fire last Christmas.

What do you call a kite that doesn't fly. A broken kite.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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