Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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david poredos

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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Knock Knock Who's there? a tree

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Q: what do you call a man that see's a unicorn A: hallucinating

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why did the boy and girl go under the covers together? because they were cold

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Why Didnt John Return any of his calls he was in a very serious car accident fell into a coma and will probablly will not wake up ever again

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What page are you on The gay page.

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how do u talk to a person you like go up and talk to them

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What do you call a Christmas tree with lights on it? A Christmas tree with lights on it.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

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Why couldn't the black baby swim? Babies do not posses the muscular capacity nor technique to enable them to properly swim.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

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Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

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Q:What do you get when you mix a tiger and a panda? A:nothing, its impossible

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Knock Knock! Whos there? The Game!

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What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

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squash squash who squash my ass

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

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Why did the mexican immigrant have no friends? He lacked social skills and was unfamiliar with American mannerism's.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

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whats worse than dieing in an airplane? jumping out of the airplane to save yourself and emediatly getting shredded by the massive engine you did not have the wits to see.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops