A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

Two pretzels were walking down the street when one got assaulted...

it was a breazy night my pecker was shriveld up like a loose bit of ham. i tucked it in between my legs and dicided to pull my pants down to my ancles and began to run like a sissy. i saw a stumpy little juice ed in the distance it was peter andre he told me that he wanted a slut fucken and said he wanted to pull my banjo right back to the balls and suck it till the moon goes down i cumed all over his glasses then we began to kiss i bent over for him and he stook is fat fucken trout in my dark tight cave there was swet dripping from my cock aka carl mcvittie

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

How did the Black man die at the KFC? Someone killed him.

Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

Why can't helen Keller read? She's dead.

Q. Why did Steve Carell, the 40 year old virgin, fail to get laid? A. Erectile Dysfunctioning.

What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

life is a barrel of tomatoes...unless you paint them blue.

Why did little nancy call the police? Because her dad beats her toaster up.

I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Osama Bin Laden

What did the mute boy get for his birthday? i dont know he didnt tell me

Why did the kid have a toy truck? because he bought it

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your son has been in a car accident and has died.

Do you want to hear a bad joke? A bad joke

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

A man walked into a bar. He said ow.

yomamas so fat it made Ben kanobi say thats no moon thats yo mama!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...