How many Mexicans can you fit in a Smart car? None. It's too damn small!

You want to hear a joke? Republican

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

Why did greg come to America? Because he wanted visit the states

Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

How many people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, more people would just make it harder.

Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

Knock Knock. Knockin on Heavens door, oh hey come in

I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

Q. Why did the kid drop his tennis racket? A. Because he got run over by a tank!

Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

why does beyonce sing to the left? because it has a catchy tune

How do you confuse a blonde? I guess the same way you confuse someone of any other hair color.

How do you tell the difference between a bomb and an Asian? One blows up.

Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary Mary who? Mary Smith.

One day, a bear happoned across a man and said "How do you do today good sir?" but the man ran away screaming "OH CRAP, BEARS!!!!" because it just sounded like bear growling (which i would love to dedicate to my friend Chris Bradley, just to make the ball to stick ratio too high)

Knock Knock DAMMIT WOMAN MAKE ME A SAMMACH

Why does little susie enjoy her life? Because it was her birthday 364 days ago.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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