Hit me and kick me were on a log. Hit me fell off, swan to shore, and went home.

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What is large, heavy, tastes like poptarts, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A semi truck full of poptarts

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Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

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What do you say if you see a monkey driving a car? Nothing , you run away because primates are incapable to have motor skill and will probably crash within the next 50 feet

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An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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why do people play xbox 360's? because there poor people who cant afford a ps3

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How did the ball fall from the cup? It didn't, it happened to be tied to a string attached to the cup.

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What is the best way to kill Kony? Shoot him in the head.

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Chuck Norris can carry very heavy objects.

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Why was the 7 year old girl crying? Because its hard to laugh during gang rape.

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if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

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J.D. has 10 vaginas and 2 penis's

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Latvia isn't a joke

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Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

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what did the blue paint say to the red paint? i am blue

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Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

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Hey guess what? What? I have good news and bad news. The bad news is you're mom died. I lied about the good news.

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Adam Turkolowoskiaklfadjufsdjksbgsgsafafdsg

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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