you wanna hear a good anti joke?, so do i

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Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

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Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

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What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

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Scientific fact: If you took all the veins from your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

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John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

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A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

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What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

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why did the kid fall off the swing? someone threw a fridge at him

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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What did the boy do when he ran out of Pringles? He killed himself.

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roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

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What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

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Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

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Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

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What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me anytime you're free, but I can't guarantee I will answer because I could be at work.

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people on this site vote for anti-jokes that make them laughed

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whats long ,hard and full of sea men ? a sumureen

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Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

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Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was standing next to you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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