Why did the chicken cross the road?... To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q. What do you call a deceased rodent A. Deadmau5

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the man die a slow and painful death? Because he kept submitting stupid, recycled anti-jokes over and over; so, I killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

There are two monkeys sittingn a bathtub. The first one says, "Scratch my back Mack." The second one says, "That's okay Joe I've got a radio of my own." (laugh like you think it is funny)

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why can't Helen Keller conduct a Train. Because she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What is so bad about a black jew. They have to sit in the back of the gas chamber

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops