What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -John. -Hey John, come on in.

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Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

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What's a Gingers favorite drink? Coke!

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Andrew's a bald wankstain.

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Your mom was so fat, She was overweight.

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If you see a pink banana, you are color blind.

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retard

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

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vitamin c

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A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

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Steven and Daniel are playing with super soakers in the back yard. Steven says to Daniel: "You can't squirt me!" Daniel says to Steven: "Yes I can!" Daniel is HIV positive.

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How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

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A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper.'" Then the mother, realizing how her son could later become confused, clarified. She said, "You can say you have to pee as long as you say it in a quiet voice." The boy understood. There were no problems afterwards.

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Why couldnt the woman wear her new necklace? She was decapitated

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The IRS, we're taking your house. This is a vacation notice, please be out of the property in 30 days. Have a nice day.

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What did the Holocaust survivor say when asked about their memories in the deathcamps? A: I'd rather not think about it.

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I'vegto a riddel for you;l Do siolve it. during the day... I look liek a snake By night?///////////////// What ams i? Rack your brains

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Why is Osama bin laden so hard to find? Because he is dead.

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What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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