How do you make a lumberjack cry? By murdering his family.

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What did the guy say to the mushroom? You're a fungi

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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Why can't a Tyrannosaurus-Rex clap? It's Dead.

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there" "BOO" "BOO WHO" "No it's just BOO"

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Whats bloody and is dead. My son.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Notice how Anti-Joke MISSPELLED "user", writing "uses" instead. Probably most of you didn't notice until I posted this :)

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YOU

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I now pronounce you man and lion. You may now kiss the pride.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand. thats impossible, because nature says that ducks cannot walk.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, Everything is gray, I'm a dog.

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Frances. Frances who? Frances Payne.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

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I'm a champion. I do what I want.

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Why do Mexicans get made fun of? Because they are Mexican

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What do you do when life gives you Oranges? You make lemonade and life wonders how you did it

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Q: What did the Jewish man find when he turned on his shower? A: gas

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Why did the black man buy ten packets of Kool-Aid at the supermarket? Because it is a refreshing beverage that many individuals enjoy drinking.

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what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

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This is a haiku. Not a very good haiku, But still a haiku.

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Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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