What happens if Chuck Norris meets a Transformer? Nothing. They would converse, then go their separate ways. Or Chuck would get killed. Horribly.

Q. I'm not hot, I'm not cold I'm not young, I'm not old I'm not lame, I'm not cool I'm not smart, and I'm not a fool. What am I? A. Text

What's green, yellow, and red? A traffic light

Q: why does the fire breather hate his job A: his parents were burned to death MR

why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

penis haha

Like does not mean said. You can blame Justin Bieber for that one, cuz he was like "Baby Baby Baby" and I was like "no"

Women's rights.

knock knock who's there aids aids who ... dumb ass

How do you prank a blind man? Uou leave the plunger in the toilet.

Why didn't the cat have any legs? Because it was a snake

How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

Your Mother

knock knock who's there? the milk man the milk man who? the milk man who brings your milk every morning

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

where do some birds live in? Earth

whats purple and has legs? Nothing, i lied about both

Why was the man sad? He was molested as a child.

whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

Why did the girl gO shopping?! Because she got paid and wanted to blow(;

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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