Yo mommas so fat that when she walked into the ocean all the whales were far away. However, if the whales did happen to be closer to your mom it would be highly improbable that they would sing.

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What do you call a green land with wheels? Grass lied about the wheels.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 BIG black guys? The most common NFL Offence

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And the girl said: "I'll be ready in 2 hours!"

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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An Asian walks into a bar, but the bartender asks him to leave the bartender replies "we're closing soon" but he secretly harbored racist views that he had not yet come to terms with and was deeply ashamed of.

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To be, or not to be. That is not the question. The question is, what time is it?

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wanna hear a joke? i dont

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There were three people on an airplane. A Mexican, an American and an Italian. The plane chrashed and they all died.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Q: what did the black man say after the white man said knock knock A: who's there

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

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Wanna know what makes me smilee? Facial Muscles

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A blind man and his dog walk into a store, the man lifts up the dog and begins to spin around. When questioned about his activity the man replies, "I'm just looking around"

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Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

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Why did the goose cross the road? He was playing duck, duck, goose

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Richard.

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What is a dog's favorite color? None,dogs have colorblindness.

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There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

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How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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