Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

it was a breazy night my pecker was shriveld up like a loose bit of ham. i tucked it in between my legs and dicided to pull my pants down to my ancles and began to run like a sissy. i saw a stumpy little juice ed in the distance it was peter andre he told me that he wanted a slut fucken and said he wanted to pull my banjo right back to the balls and suck it till the moon goes down i cumed all over his glasses then we began to kiss i bent over for him and he stook is fat fucken trout in my dark tight cave there was swet dripping from my cock aka carl mcvittie

Why can't helen Keller read? She's dead.

Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

Why did little nancy call the police? Because her dad beats her toaster up.

What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

Why did the blind boy cross the road? Why? The world may never know. He was hit by a bus

Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

Q. Why did Steve Carell, the 40 year old virgin, fail to get laid? A. Erectile Dysfunctioning.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

what do you say to the preacher when he walks into church? i dont fu***** know, im jewish.

Why did the baby fall out of the trees? Cause it was dead.

Teacher: "Kenny, what is the biggest mammal on land?" Kenny: "A stranded whale."

A blonde, red head and brunette decide the jump off a cliff....... They all die

Why was little Sammy crying? because she had a frog stapled to her forehead

"Knock Knock," "Whos There?" "The Pizza Guy" "I hate pizza."

Why did the black man walk into a bar? To order a drink.

What do you call the fear of anteaters? Stupid.

What's worse than having two girlfriends at once? Seven. Seven girlfriends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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