What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

Joe used to always talk about his family and his two wonderful kids Joe can no longer talk to or about his family because his smoking habits have gotten out of control

There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

Rebecca Black walks into a bar she took the back seat

What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

what worse than a worm in your apple being kidnapped by hores and eaten alive by rabbits

What's a good joke? Not this one.

200,000 people are homeless! ...this year in america!

How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

whats worse then getting fired from your job? Getting raped by a giant gorilla with a 4 foot long penis following by being bitten by a very poisonous rattle snake and slowly dying a painful death.

A man and a friend are playing golf one day. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: "Wow! That is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are truly a kind man." The other man replies, "Yeah, well, we were married 35 years."

Continents are large islands.

Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

why is 6 afraid of 7 7 is a registered sex offender

"What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby" "One's fun to hit with a bat and the other One's a watermelon.

Papa Smurf: Why did the chicken cross the road? Grouchy Smurf: I hate chickens!

Q: What happened when the Mexican went to the doctors? A: He was diagnosed with depression.

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of shit. I don't have a pile of shit in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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