Knock Knock. I paid good money for a doorbell. Use it, please.

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Whats eight feet tall, purple, smooth, delicious, uses proper grammar, and likes dolphins. I don't know.

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A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

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Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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a woman votes!

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Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

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What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

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Did you hear about the one about the man who walked into the library? He likes reading

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What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

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What's the worlds most popular burger? The Krabby Patty

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why was the witch in the broom factory? she was recently employed there and is loving her job maing brooms

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What do Ash Ketchum and Peter Francis Geraci have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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What do you call a black priest? a priest, you racist

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. It was the chickens decision thus, not affecting your life greatly. You should therefore mind your own business and let the chicken live his life with capability of using it's rights.

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How do you stop a air plane? You throw small infants into the turbine.

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What do call a someone with no arms, legs, and has an eye patch? Names

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What do you get when you cross Jesus with James Woods? Crucifixion

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A man had two horses. One was black and one was white. He cut the tail of one of them to tell them apart.

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It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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a mexican guy and a black guy are in a car, who is driving? the mexican, the black guy is in the passenger seat

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I bought my daughter the Josef Fritzl advent calendar. The proceeds go towards abuse survivor charities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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