Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

What happened when the Irish ran out of potatoes? Millions starved.

1d

Jimmy wanted a bike for Christmas He got cancer instead.

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

Amazing

Yo mamma is so fat her blood type is RAGU

Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

how do you wake up a black man? scream!!!!!

Why did Sheryl Go to the Bathroom? Cause she had Direha...........

Why don't jews believe in Jesus Because jews believe Jesus Christ was not their savior

They see me trollin' They hatin'...

I have a joke that involves a duck. Can you guess what it is? If not, then.......uh...........sorry.

Roses are red, violetes are red, I'm colorblind

Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? being wrongly accussed of a crime you didnt commit because of your race, and being put on death row

A man walks into a bar carrying a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender says, "We don't serve construction workers here."

so the weather's nice...

What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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