Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

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why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

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Why did Christopher Columbus sail to America? Because sailing was faster than swimming.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Hey Eliza, thanks, while I appreciate the help, Alice is crying in a corner and refusing to get up, I wont lie, for a moment there I could "see voices and music" and valium has taken care of the ptsd (and blown most of my brain, which is nice for a change). With that said, im on 40 mg ritalin which is a lot, but I need it, besides I can handle the anxiety. I have no idea who the guy typing this is, but he is following me to the letter, so thats good enough, except his typos being worse than mine, which is pretty good for a guy that barely speaks english. Sorry Eliza, but Alice is having a breakdown here, ill talk her down a bit first, she tries to hide it, but she is far more worried about me than I am, which is nice, just not like this, ill be right back with you.

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Why is wood brown Because wood is brown

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more chocolate?

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Q.When is a dog, not a dog? A. never

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how do you get a blonde one-handed woman out a tree? wave

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A White, Black, Hispanic, and an Asian man are stranded on a deserted island. They become best friends, proving race should not be a divisive factor in any community.

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24

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why did haris die...............................................his hair blond? .. u

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Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great distance she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish.

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Where's Waldo? In rehab. Waldo is in rehab.

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A boy tells his teacher, "I want to be like hitler when I grow up and kill all the jews and one clown." The teacher replies, "Why the clown?" The boy says, "See no one cares about the jews."

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wormly wormly sat on the worm theworm said wormly and went to warmly

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What do you get when you cross chocolate pudding with your mother's slippers? A spanking.

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what's worse that reading something that just wasted seconds of your life? reading this and wasting more seconds.

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wnna here a joke, toby limbers playing basketball

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Ask this to your friend. "Yo man, I really need your help on this question. Can you tell me color comes after 9?" guaranteed "wtf"

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What does one call black men pushing a car up a hill? Black Car. What does one call white men pushing a car up a hill? White Car. What does one call Mexicans pushing a car up a hill? Grand Theft Auto

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wanna here a good joke? me too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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