Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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how do you get a blonde one-handed woman out a tree? wave

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Why is the fat kid on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, WITHOUT MY HEART I CANNOT LOVE YOU

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Velcro. What a rip off.

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Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

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Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds? Michael Jackson is dead.

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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What is white And taste like sheep A sheep

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Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

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Q: what did one guy say to another guy? A: I don't know!

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walk into your friend’s house and say “what’s up with the dead guy out front?” (you have to murder a person for this joke to work)

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an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

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What does the Fawkes say? "Remember, remember, the 5th of November..."

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There was a 4-car accident in Mexico today. 87 people died.

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Why did the swing fall off the girl? I have dyslexia

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Intel Core Computers answer robot flavored phones at middle of june CC

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Bumsniffer

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WOMENS RIGHTS

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how much could a wood-chuck chuck if a wood-chuck could chuck wood? it doesnt matter because they can not chuck wood

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Q: What does a Jedi say when another Jedi farts? A: Who sabered the cheese?

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Why do all gingers get mad all the time except having sex? Because they enjoy it!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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