How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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My Nan, that is all.

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Why was the pig sweating? It wasnt, because pigs have adapted by using behavioral thermoregulation, which is the act of cooling themselves in the mud or water.

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ass.

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A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

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I scream. You scream. We all scream. Because there is a rapist in the room.

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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i'll leave 'em dead in the living room. get it leave 'em dead in the living room

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What happens when a jewish man, black man, asian and an amish man get on the same plane heading to Chicago? The reach their destinations safely and go their separate ways.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Wolf Wolf who? Wolf who!? Is that really the first question that comes to mind when confronted with a talking wolf?

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like if u think princess kenny id the fairest maiden in all the land. if u havent played or watched pewdiepie play south park the stick of truth, disregard this message.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being unaware of his surroundings, the chicken was startled by an oncoming motor vehicle. Due to the animals vapid logic an reasoning, based on impulse it quickly ran to the other side of the street to avoid its imminent death by the speeding automobile. Unknowingly, the chicken had reached the other side of the road,

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

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Why did Sarah limp to school? Because she got hit by a tree

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What did the fish say when it hit a wall? Nothing. Fish cannot talk.

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What do you call a black man on steroids? Strong.

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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What's the heaviest part of an elephant? Its body.

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Winter

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What did the tree say to the boy? Nothing. As i recall, trees are unable to speak and or show signs of emotion.

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What about all the bullshit comments? The spamming?

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Roses are red Violets are blue we're going to have sex because i'm stronger than you

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

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What is greater than God, More evil than the Devil, The poor have it, The rich need it, If you eat it, you will die? Madelyns head

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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