What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

doctor,doctor my eyesight is getting worse, you are certainly right, this is the post office

What has a fiery tail and is mentally handicapped? Charetard.

Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

Robin, get in the car!

You're mother has had a heart attack in the middle of the street, you start to sing amazing grace hoping people will join in, but unfortunatly this is not a musical and you should call 911.

What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

Did you hear about the sick juggler? Turns out he had cancer on his brain tumour.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

Ask me if my names Troy. Is your name troy? No, it's Roy.

I want to make a lamp shade out of your skin, because you light up my life.

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for doing nothing? A black man

Q: How Do You Stop a Bus? A: Pull the Brakes so it comes to a absolute stop.

Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

Do you know what's funny? 9/11

roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

What do you call a black woman that flys a plane? - a pilot...

How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? He has flourished throughout his musical career and is a very accomplished man, as he has won many Grammys

I took my mum for a big shop the other day, we used the parent and child spot, not like there's an age range on it. - Peter Kay Try parking in the furthest spot away from the shop and you might burn some calories. -Me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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