Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why can't Helen Kellen drive? She's a woman.

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Nothing.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

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What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

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Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari ? I don't have a Ferrari in my basement.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your cousin. Kathy then let Jim inside her house and helped him carry the pizza boxes into the kitchen. Everyone had fun and enjoyed the party very much that night.

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What do you do to become a hairdresser? Set Off the fire alarm

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Pick up Lines skeet skeet skeet! JLR

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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I like colin but not as much as apple

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Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

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What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

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kcid gib a evah uoy neht sdrawkcab siht daer nac uoy fi

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so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

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Why was the boy's face red? He put his cat in a blender.

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A Jew, an atheist, and an Asian man walk into a bar. They all have a drink and then go home to their families

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Why did the TV fall of a cliff? Because a nice man was donating it to the homeless shelter which hangs over a cliff. The man placed the TV in the back room on the floor. There was a weak spot on the floor and when the fattest homeless person walked over the floor, the floor broke which was a HUGE inconvenience because he TV and the fat man fell through the floor and over the cliff, luckily the TV was plugged in so it was hanging by the cord but an old lady with Alzheimer's forgot that there was a hole in the floor and unplugged the TV so she could clean the switches. In the end the TV fell off the cliff.

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What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck What starts with P and ends with ORN? Popcorn What starts with B and ends with ITCH? Bewitch

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My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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