Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What did Iran say to Israel? ALLLLAHH

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 7 ate 9!

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Koalas mum is a slut

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Pete and Repeat were in a boat, Pete jumped out. Repeat was concerned-not only because his name was typically used as a verb and not something parents normally name a baby, but about why Pete would jump out of the boat? Pete wondered what to do next-should he jump in and see if Pete is okay? He also wondered if he should he change his name to Kevin.

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The last time I heard that joke, I fell off my pet single celled bacteria.

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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What do you get when you mix a ginger with gasoline? a forest fire.

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Dyslexics are teople poo

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How do you circumsize a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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What do you call a man with no home or family? Charles Manson…He currently resides in jail.

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Your text.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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How does camon Die? He kills himself because he didnt make it into the marine corps

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What do you call a smart blond? A golden retriever!

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the Shell Station.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

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What did the blind, deaf, and dumb child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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