Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

Relax, I said some pretty vile things to you when I thought you where a guy seducing me while it became ever more apparent that you where pretending to be me, thing is I often use this site to vent my frustrations and earning the "praise" in the form of red thumbs by the people. I wont say your name, but I know who you are now, the girl with the big red scared eyes, I mean how many one handed 27 year old`s do I know? I am in my early thirties, that`s all I am willing to share for now, If people come around trying to poke out my remaining eye, I am ready (my waifu, is at her mother`s place, she knows I am still a wanted target by, well some people here and there.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other is a baby.

Why did Hitler kill so many Jews? Because he didn't like them.

Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

A chicken crosses the road and goes into a bar and recites the following poem: Roses are red Violets are blue Knock Knock Who's there? Sugar is sweet Sugar is sweet who? And so are you. The bartender was confused considering she's a blonde. A genie appears and says to the Mexican he'll grant him 3 wishes. The black guy, the white guy, and the jew were at the bar also. The priest was also drinking. They all had a great time.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What's the deal with brown?

If you have a large penis.give this joke a thumbs up. ( :

Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

Knock Knock Who's there? The FBI. We need to check your house for dead bodies.

Why did the baby fall out of the trees? Cause it was dead.

a pope and a catholic priest walk into a bar... the priest orders... then the pope says to the bartender "I'll have what hes having." so the bartender takes out a small child and says ...."are you sure?"

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is right behind 7 and he's naked.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

If video games were peaceful. Man! You are so strait! That was so good man! GG.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are productive members of society. -Canis

how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

A homeless man gets a computer. Later that day he is found dead inside the computer.

Why was't the Elephant allowed on the Airplane? He didn't have a boarding pass

Why do black men like bit butts? Because they can not lie.

What has a mouth but cant talk Helen keller What has eyes but cant see Helen keller What has ears but cant hear You guessed it an ear of corn

a jewish guy walks in to a bar says to the bartender says "I have aids" and the jewish man replys "my bad"

A plane crashed in the border of mexico and USA. Where do you bury the survivors? tell me in the thing bellow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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