Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw it after I chopped its' head off.

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I AM YOUR SALVATION! And you are my poopstain

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Well you see....

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What do a purple grape and an elephant have in common? They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Cool Brian

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MySpace.

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Poop.

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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How do the american stop getting fat ? They don't.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

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What did the mute girl say to the other mute girl?

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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what's red and horny a red unicorn

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Knock, knock Who's there? You... and you just lost the game. -Eka

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Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

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Why do hummingbirds hum? They don't realize how annoying it is.

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A dog walks into a bar. the owner of the bar didn't allow animal in his bar and he helped the dog outside again

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Why did the German Constitutional Court issue Decision 2 BvR 1390/12 on September 12, 2012? Because they wanted to refuse the request for a temporary injunction in regards to the European Stability Mechanism!

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A man and a woman are in a bar. The man says, "Excuse me miss, but you're very attractive, may I please buy you a drink?" to which the woman replies, "Thank you very much, but I'm afraid I've never been to Mexico."

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Q: Why did the bear fall out of the tree? A: Because humans tranquilized him, brought him to an animal shelter 100 miles away from his home. Then after he got out he got hit by a car and died. PETA is watching.....always

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How do you get your clock to stop ticking? Hit it with a sledge hammer.

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My did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops