What is the difference between a lion and a tiger? A lion ,on average, weighs 31 kilograms more.

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Why did the doctor commit suicide? His wife was recently killed in a car accident and simply could not take the emotional pain!

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How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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learn the ropes?

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what do you call a a miget crossed with a vampire? A miget, vampires are a figment of you're screwed up imagination.

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What is green fuzzy and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Why is there no gambling in Africa? Because there's no money in Africa.

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Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

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Why do cats have eyes? So they can see.

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A duck, a rabbi, a homosexual, and the president walk into a bar. As a result, bruises appeared on their foreheads.

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you know what hurts, a revolver bullet in your brain.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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what did the boy get after his first communion? unwanted intercourse with his priest that resulted in scaring him for life, until the day he killed himself because he could never get over it.

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What's the difference between a duck? A toothbrush, because a car only has four doors!

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What's worse than waking up with a hangover? Not waking up at all

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Really? Okay! UPPER COMMENT GOOD NIGHT NEROCHAN!

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A Chinese kid fails his math test.

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Why did the elephant fall on the marshmallow? Because he didn't want to fall in the hot chocolate!

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What's wanted by none, wanted by one, and is worse than Terran Hansen? Brooke Colbert. Go you Jesse.

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What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops